Sunset in the Mojave Desert, taken on a roadtrip in 2007

If life were a road trip this stretch of the journey would be the desert midday... or maybe North Dakota in the middle of winter, in an old clunker...and I'm alone. But not really because the very circumstance of this part of the trek allows me to focus on things that are lasting and more precious than anything material, and that can bring me more joy than if I were cruising down the California coast on a perfect day with a carload of people. It's that solitude and those circumstances that allow me to feel what I need to feel, learn what I need to learn, and eventually become who I need to become.

Driving through desolate terrain I feel God's love more intensely in my life, and it is sustaining. I feel uncomfortable, and I know that I am being refined. I feel alone, and I see more clearly the angels in my life. I feel inadequate and weak, and I am humbled. I start to feel like the clunker won't make it, and I am reminded that I didn't make it this far on my own.

I know there will be times in life (tomorrow? in a month? year? five years?) when I will trade in my clunker for a luxury car, and the less than beautiful terrain for endless portrait landscapes and breathtaking coasts. My goal is to be able to enjoy that comfort and beauty while still seeking and experiencing the true, unfailing source of comfort and joy. God's love. I want to prove myself during both the beautiful and the difficult stretches of this trip. I really do love roadtrips... and I am learning to appreciate every stretch of the journey.