Mama Tress

I got to spend a few lovely hours with this amazing little mama and her cuties on Saturday. I think the best part was getting lunch while the laundry was drying. We picked up some sandwiches, didn't feel like walking all the way to the park (ok I didn't), so we found a blocked off part of road. We plopped down in the middle of the street and started eating. Then some dogs started barking so we moved to the non-blocked off part of the street. A picnic in the middle of the street. Della Gatta style. It was so normal.

And just a few months ago he was this small

Sunrise Walks Lately

So funny how my timing very often is not the Lord's timing. When I found out I had Mono I thought I would be tired for a month MAX, then be back to normal life. That would have put me back to normal by January 1st. And here it is April 3rd. Spring has arrived. The weather is beautiful. And my body does not seem to be cooperating with my timetable. Just as I was starting to feel better, able to run some mornings, go to the gym, be at work a full day, be social ... the mono returned.

But it's ok. This is what patience is about. And faith. And hope. And all the other lessons I am learning and attributes I am (hopefully) developing. I realized this morning as I was doing research on a subject into which I am putting a lot of effort in my life, that repetition and practice is how we learn. I have so much knowledge in this particular area but it takes reminding myself, working at it, and applying that knowledge to see the changes.

This applies to attributes. This experience will teach me many things, but it will not be the end of difficult experiences. I will need them throughout my life to teach me the very same principles I am learning now. Hopefully I learn them on a deeper level and gain new depths of understanding over time, but they really do come down to the same basic principles.

I am so grateful that the people in my life have stood out more than ever as my greatest blessings. I am inspired to be a better person, friend, daughter, sister, aunt, niece, teacher, colleague, as my friends and family show unbelievable love, patience, and acceptance.

So the sunrise walks which are keeping me sane lately...

Trying New Things...

Swimming Lessons (even though I took years of these when I was little... still can't get the breathing down on freestyle)
Voice Lessons
Signed up for a Century Ride
Zambia
Taking a Quilting Class
Walking with friends

All part of healing, living life, and finding the blessings already there.


Like being with these girls in Carmel. Best weekend ever.

Africa Bound

I remember reading in the Reader's Digest about a young boy who went to a region of Africa and made a difference through his ingenuity and desire to help. It became a dream to somehow make a difference for people in need. I've tried to do this throughout my life, but this opportunity to participate in Mothers Without Borders has come the closest to this long time dream. 

I will cover the cost of my own expenses, so funds raised for this effort go directly to providing safe shelter, food, clean water, and education to orphaned and abandoned children in Zambia. My goal is also to assure these children that there are people who care about them. Ultimately I hope to help them see their own value as I also provide basic needs.

Every little bit counts. If you would like to donate, here's the link. Thank you my dear friends and family! And strangers if I don't know you:)

A Picture Says a Thousand Words

So this is my life right now...

And I am right under where the sun is peaking through the thickest clouds. Moving in the direction of the foreground of the photo.

Over the past few months, as I have put all my faith and energy and emotional bandwidth... and much of my money... into some personal work, the Lord has set the stage perfectly. The process has been painful, but necessary. I asked Him to show me my true value and worth. I asked Him to help me value myself for the best reasons. I want not to find confidence not in how I look or what I do or the reasons others value me or in my gifts or talents... or whatever else has given me value aside from the the very most important thing. I am seeking to depend on my divine worth, that I am God's daughter, for my self esteem.

That prayer has been answered in ways I would have never imagined and in ways I would have never asked for. I can no longer depend on much of what I depended on in the past. True to the nature of such sources of confidence, they are temporary and transient. When I embarked on this journey I had no idea what I was about to lose.

I have a feeling, as I see myself in the background of this photo, I have no idea what I have to gain. And how much greater that is than what I have lost. I continue this journey attempting to let go. The less I cling to what I think it should entail and the less I attempt to hasten the process, the more meaning I will find in even the most difficult aspects of it. And hopefully in time the clouds will become a little more scattered. The sunshine a little more abundant. But I also hope the lessons of this journey will stay with me for a very very long time.

Jan. 4th. Another attempted run. Turned jog. Turned speed walk. Turned achy old lady strut. Nothing like being sick to make you appreciate things you took advantage of. I can't wait to go for a good run again!

Jan. 2nd.

Thumb wars. The three way is way more fun.

Sisters united. Love these lovely ladies.

This little man was my sunshine through a couple of rough days. Love my little Moon.

Pismo Pier. Classic.

Last sunset in Pismo.

Shane, Mica, Jesse. 

Walk with Angel Heather the day after Christmas at Avila. Favorite beach with one of my favorite people. 

Mama and Baby on our walk around the neighborhood with Grandpa. I love their connection. Waking up in the morning with Kristina, Tress, and Mica and just playing was one of my favorite parts of being home.

Sunset on the way to Christmas dinner at Kimberly's.

Dad won for finding the best way to entertain Mica.

Some of My All Time Favorite Dances