And you realize why it is a gift and a blessing to be here, on earth, with a body. Even with all the pain, sickness, tiredness, limitations. Because with that body comes the freedom to move, feel, experience, grow.
Moments lately when I have felt deep gratitude for my body.
1. When I was swimming in the ocean with Jennica and Kristina. It was a beautiful, clear, sunny day at Avila Beach. The water was unusually warm and the sea unusually calm (that's the way I like it). We just floated over the waves just before they broke, swam around, and eventually got out to feel the warm sun drying our salty, sandy bodies.
2. When I watched So You Think You Can Dance with Kristina, Jennica, Kelly. Completely in awe of the ability those dancers have to convey something deep, close, intimate through dance. It is more than extension, lines, technique, jumps, and turns. It is the expression of their deepest emotions. Some have the ability to convey this, and others even with impeccable skills, don't quite have that gift.
3. Which leads me to my most recent experience. This morning, for the first time since last October, I danced! Like really danced. I was on the eliptical, listening to songs I have been wanting to dance to, and left the gym to go to the other gym where they have a group exercise room perfect for dancing. There was a guy practicing juggling and other magic tricks (I figured if anyone was self conscious it would be him), so I just took up the other half of the room and it all came back. Actually, even more than before. I can see where I lack in technique (and cardio... my heart felt like it was going to jump out of my chest) but the ability to express through dance and appreciate what I create is there, and greater than before. I felt that connection, and was grateful for this body which just last night put me in bed, exhausted, at 7:30pm (I figure I have a few more months of mono days). And I got to dance to my recent favorite, Old Skin.
Moments lately when I have felt deep gratitude for my body.
1. When I was swimming in the ocean with Jennica and Kristina. It was a beautiful, clear, sunny day at Avila Beach. The water was unusually warm and the sea unusually calm (that's the way I like it). We just floated over the waves just before they broke, swam around, and eventually got out to feel the warm sun drying our salty, sandy bodies.
2. When I watched So You Think You Can Dance with Kristina, Jennica, Kelly. Completely in awe of the ability those dancers have to convey something deep, close, intimate through dance. It is more than extension, lines, technique, jumps, and turns. It is the expression of their deepest emotions. Some have the ability to convey this, and others even with impeccable skills, don't quite have that gift.
3. Which leads me to my most recent experience. This morning, for the first time since last October, I danced! Like really danced. I was on the eliptical, listening to songs I have been wanting to dance to, and left the gym to go to the other gym where they have a group exercise room perfect for dancing. There was a guy practicing juggling and other magic tricks (I figured if anyone was self conscious it would be him), so I just took up the other half of the room and it all came back. Actually, even more than before. I can see where I lack in technique (and cardio... my heart felt like it was going to jump out of my chest) but the ability to express through dance and appreciate what I create is there, and greater than before. I felt that connection, and was grateful for this body which just last night put me in bed, exhausted, at 7:30pm (I figure I have a few more months of mono days). And I got to dance to my recent favorite, Old Skin.
The juggler took a picture of me this morning. Nice guy.
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